Monday, February 27, 2012

I Found Myself When Atlas Shrugged (Essay)

On August 12th, 2011, I walked into a Barnes and Noble and scoured through the fiction until I came across the thick, white novel titled, “Atlas Shrugged”. The book is the epitome of the works by modern philosopher, Ayn Rand.  I was fascinated with her writing, while at the same time scared of the depth and length of the book.   I determined I needed to read twenty pages a day if I was to finish before school began, with enough time to write an essay for the Ayn Rand Institute’s annual contest.  I began right away, reading in my friends’ car on the way to a summer party, and plowed my way through the first twenty pages that night—amazed, as always, by Rand’s ability to capture my attention with such minute details.  Some days, it was a chore to read so much of a book that, while a work of fiction, is so full of philosophy that it takes your entire mind to understand the events and concepts presented. Other days, I soared through my allotted twenty pages, as on one such day when I read more than 200 pages perched on a rock in the middle of a beautiful lake.  

I connected with the characters on an intimate level I never imagined possible with a book. I feel as though Hank Reardan, Dagny Taggart, and John Galt, three of the major characters in the story, are my friends and are with me whenever I want them to be. I began to see people as “the Reardan of this time in my life” or classify certain of my peers by saying, “Oh, he is nothing but a James Taggart”. But this is more than simple fiction-love (when a reader is so entranced with a story that they confuse the book with reality), and I assure you that I am not crazy (the voices in my head never talk back—out loud). It is more than that because within the 1069 pages of Rand’s masterpiece, I learned something about myself, the world, and how I can change it. A quote by Galt in the book, and one of the crowning phrases of philosophy within the novel, reads, “In the name of the best within us”.

 In the name of the best within us. Over and over I would say this to myself, and as I have had time to read and write about and contemplate on the book, I believe I understand what Rand intended this phrase to mean. In the name of the best within us:  representing and demonstrating all that I have to offer, I will not settle for less. This came as a bit of a revelation to me, and it is a philosophy which I now hold close to my soul, for the protection of my worth in my own eyes.  In the name of the best within me, I will settle for nothing less than the best of me, for me, or through me. I will always give my best, go my furthest, stand my longest, love my most, and excel to my highest. This book had such an impact on me that my whole philosophy on daily life is centered around it.  Every day I will wake up, ready to give my best.  No matter what happens, no matter who or what gets in the way. I find this statement is beautiful and empowering because it focuses solely on the self. By relying only on myself, there can never be any responsibility passed. All credit for my achievements will go to me, and all blame for my failures will fall on my shoulders.  It puts me truly in charge of my own ship. But this phrase not only asserts my position of full responsibility over my actions, but is a motivator to always put forth my very best. I have read many books that transported me to far off lands and distant adventures. I have, within the pages of a book, conquered dragons, and kingdoms, and crooks alike. But never before has a book not only invited, but compelled me to look to my own mind for the power to conquer, the creativity for adventure, and the strength to be everlasting. Atlas Shrugged has changed the way I see myself, the world, and my ability to live in it. Atlas Shrugged is my favorite book.

Sunday, February 26, 2012

Love like Honey

It was new at first, like a little seedling-- a sprout.
We had to test everything, figure it out,
just what our love was all about.

We grew up and up, 'till soon we could see
that though the light shone still,
life would soon be sun free.

But that didn't stop us, no
We kept drinking up the water,
we still wanted to grow.

So we did and we did
we grew up and up higher
and even as we grew, the clouds
they got darker.

Then one day, it was over.
Like that.
Not without cause.
Not without knowledge.
We saw the clouds coming all along
But did we run for cover?
no
we kissed in the rain.

Then winter came, hard and harsh
The petals now dead,
though once they were lush
Our love, like a flower it once bloomed
Now only a lonesome life,
in the distance loomed

Unknown to us,
for we were otherwise occupied
there was a kind little bee
who found our nectar bona fide.
He sipped it long and carried away
all our memories of each sweet day.

The winter was long,
and for me it was harsh
Your blossom I thought, never again
would I see it, though nearly March.

Then one day, while reflecting, I saw
that it did not hurt still,
No, not at all.
It was like swimming in honey, sweet and opaque;
All our moments were rosy,
and the pain soon felt fake.


I soon realized what a great favor
that honey bee did me,
it saved me my friend meilleur.
Back to the living now,
back to the present
I'll always be grateful for you and that bee
Life is better, now that we're back to honey.

Sunday, February 12, 2012

So what if it's Valentine's Day?

Break up with the world
Move on with your life
You don't need what they say
You've got enough work and strife
You can do things your own way
You don't need them to approve
So why don't you break up with the world
So you can find the real you

Sunday, February 5, 2012

I don't need to beat you, I just need my beats

Those people who try to own everyone, they really tick me off.
What makes you think I'm worth owning anyway?
Why don't you try to own yourself, instead, work on making yourself better today.
I don't need to be better than you, or anyone else.
I only need what makes me feel good, and that isn't beating up on the rest.
I only need the sunshine, but if not--I'll love the rain.
I only need the smiling face--but I'll embrace the pain.
If darkness falls on my grand plans, I wont fight and scream and pout.
I'll just look up to the starry sky and dream of something else.
 Life isn't always perfect, and so I've gotta' stop tryin' to be.
As long as I'm me, I'll try to be happy.
So when you wake up in the morning, and think about who you're gonna beat today;
I'll just pull on my old sneakers to go outside and play.
 All life needs is love and work and with one you'll get the other.
This isn't how it always goes, sometimes I'm downright gloomy.
But from now on I'll try to win, myself, and let His light shine through me.
This is my creed, my new motto, for facing life's tomorrow.
You may choose to walk down the halls and swing a punch or two.
I'm gonna choose to dance to a beat even if its lost on you.

Friday, February 3, 2012

--Found In Space--

She carefully laid
her head on the cold
thick glass and watched
as trees flew by.
Her life like the
swift moving pines;
her chance to make
it better-- the
disappearing darkness
between each.
It knew her
better than once thought.
She let herself
open into the space
between each knowing arm
as she knew she could
and in the space
find herself.
Find herself where she was,
when she tucked and covered.
Where light meets line
and breath and depth combine,
life she'll find.